Everyone looks like an ass when they try something new

I’m listening to Crushing it by Gary Vaynerchuck. Something he said really stuck out to me. “Everyone’s an ass until they are a pioneer.” With those words, I thought of a lot of people I have seen over the years in the internet space. “One common thing that people said was “Oh that guy is just an ass screaming at his computer while he plays a quote and quote “scary game,” They are quick to turn their noses up to it. He should get a real job they grumble. It’s so stupid they continue.

Funny story, I used to bet one of those people. In a traditional sense, it made me mad that they were doing something like that and being incredibly successful at it. Grr!! Okay Okay, I’m good now. Fast forward a couple of years and I’m getting all introspective. Maybe I’m Jealous. Maybe we’re all jealous of Pewdiepie or JackFilms. I mean they do silly things instead of being tied into the cogs of society. This ties back to what Gary Vaynerchuck said. Maybe we should risk being mocked and made fun of for a little we could end up doing something we lover in the end!

A Micro Fairy: The Page of the Explorer Part 1

The sun poured through the windows of a home on a hill. Through a small chimney, smoke wafted out out into the open clean air of the world. It was a very peaceful time indeed. The wind took breaths but it never became too much to bear, and that my friend is why I believe the man that resided there, it reflected the beat of his heart; calmness and peaceful. On this particular morning his chest beat in a sound happy rhythm, he ground up his coffee beans and his own brew, soon after a few delicate sips (you see, he possessed a heat sensitive tongue, so this was a very normal ritual) he strolled along past all of his gizmo’s and gadgets that were sprawled along the floor and made his way out onto his porch. He sat down watched the sun, while two winged creatures wrestle using the sun as a spotlight for their movements, each move was prideful yet never felt as though it lacked a level of grace, they were playing to the beat of their hearts and it made the man wonder if he could possibly one day find the right tune that they were using. The light gleamed off their green and red scales respectively though from his distance it was only a shimmer to the man’s misty blue eyes.

Then through another sip he became sure that the idea he had just had was somewhat crazy, yet still it was nonetheless entertaining to him and at that very moment of total peace, it was all that mattered. Soon however as his senses further awoke, it became apparent that there had been a hard rainfall the night prior. The air had that pure taste that he was quite fond of. Though upon further inspection of his surroundings, as he took in the peace he noticed a slight disturbance amongst the flowers planted along his windows. A pink tulip seemed to posses a sudden tilt downward as there was a gain in the weight on the west most of petals.

He found his curiosity to be getting the best of him, he put his hand gently below the petals, in an effort to catch whatever could be inside. Without a second to pass by, the smallest feet he had ever laid eyes on graced his vision. Putting his hand close enough to the feet in order to give them a standing point, the being fell forward, not bracing itself for the impact and falling into his gasp following the light pressure of a metal object hitting his hands. Little bolts and screws popped out of the the device . The transparent wings glistened with droplets of water, they had small inscriptions on them. He found them to be illegible. Though could not deny the beauty of the design. They were a fairy’s wings. He took a breath to move back indoors, his hands trembling until he was able to place the being soundly onto his desk.

He went to grab the smallest of cloths he could find and put it over the creatures body, all in an effort to keep it warm. Then he set to work to make a bed, after all the guest should be comfortable. In that time he quietly sang to himself as he carved the the wood into the ideal shapes needed for his project. Time flew by, before he knew it, night had fallen. He picked up the fairy and put the newly crafted bed. The fairy stirred in her sleep, some part of her knew she a different place, yet she was not fearful. The only thing he could notice was her willingness to get even more comfortable.

It peaked the man’s interest, so he took some time for himself to do his research. He pulled out a thick book, the pages feeling rough and grainy. It possessed a great many drawings of creatures he had never had the luck of seeing in person. The drawing never stained any pages that they were not a part of. He took a breath, trying his hardest to contain his excitement. For the very first time, he had his own part of history to write out. That little fairy was unlike any other that he had seen. The little clothing she wore looked as though it were from another time. It was not a typical dress or other garment that his eyes had been able to process before… To him it was obscure and unnatural. The other drawings sported a different degree of dresses. Some were short and others long and quite the opposite.

Now to you or me, this clothing is far closer to the realm of familiarity: It was blue cloth wrapped around her lower half. Now he studied it in comparison to what he had given her. It was just a dress, one with colors of roses. Pink red and white… She certainly looked quite pretty in what he had given her but still… there was a feeling tugging at his heart strings, her hand was reaching for her own items even in her half dazed sleep. Her wild brown hair, seemed to take up the consistency of a pillow all on its own as her head rested.

In the following hours the man watched her and continued his drawing to document the occasion for the research of others. He had no inherent drawing talent, never practicing much beyond when his worked called for it. It was all in the pen, as it glided across the paper, the image became more and more coherent, sculpting out her face and finer curves, in the first picture her eyes were closed due to her current resting state. Then in some of the later hours he found himself wanting rest as well. He did. Though in a short sliver of time, The little creature was up and about on her own became instantly fascinated with the man eye lids. She quickly curled herself up near his nose and waited… She wasn’t sure what for but it was compelling to her none the less. She liked the new dress that was now in her possession, it felt silky to her skin, likely placed into the laughing tears of a scaly bird ….

The little thing pulled out her note pad from her older set of clothes that had been cleaned with the scent of strawberries. She found herself needing to climb over the many small contraptions. She had no fear of waking the man as her feet were far too small to even register against his ears. She went over to the large piece of parchment and saw the drawing’s head off to the right of her. She stood firm with her hands on her hips and looked in the direction of the ink. Then she closed her eyes and pressed her hands against her eyelids ever so delicately, then returned her gaze to the picture, a warm glow from the candle beside her gave her warmth. The white wax was dripping into a small pool in the side of the paper, though it had been occurring so slowly that it was still connected to the candle stick holder in a line that was rough around the edges.

Oh yes.. she remembered what her original intent was… she looked down at the parchment once more as her dress was molded to her body and felt so soft once again. The tears of the laughing scaly bird , of course! She jumped to her own exciting discovery, She wrote down, “The Hum can make the big birds laugh?. Then next she drew herself as if she were pondering all of the questions of the world and the sky held all the answers… (She was unsure if he would understand the last bit so she added a happy cloud above her and then also added a happy sun in the corner for good measure.)

And then because she could again, there was a smiling flower towering above her… She was getting a little carried away.. yet she kept going, soon there was grass that was happy as well and a little dewdrop also happy of course… then she fell asleep.. her wings sprawled out on each side. Then when she came to in the early rise of the bright light, she moved back into her sleeping arrangements. The paper was left to be the discovery of the other wether intentional or not.

The man woke up gently.. got his drink in his normal routine and headed back to his desk…. He saw the drawing, with all the happy things.. ”Likes happy things he wrote as a little aside Then he noticed the original drawing cluttered in the center, the one where she looked to be pondering something . He could not quite make out the words… Does not Focus well Was all he could think to write though he swiftly added something else In a cute way though He then connected her paper of smiles to his own with an arrow drawn toward it…. That was all that happened that day. The man went out on his porch again, this time with her tiny contraption in hand and placed it at a good angle to capture the look if the creatures in front of his home as they play fought into the beams of sunlight. He could see the crystal on the top of the device glistening. He left it there in hope the little thing may way at a reasonable time wake once more and see it right there waiting for her. Perhaps he would get lucky and get to see her use it.

Even if she never took the opportunity , it was just the right thing to do. Now maybe that sounds cliche,,, but there was no reason not to do such things. There she was still sleeping, and she was excellent at making no noise. He was certain of that. Most of the fairy types were like that. He quietly returned to his work to take notes on her but kept getting distracted by the note from her. Perhaps there was more to it than he originally perceived. Through the scribbles, he was finally able to make out her question of his relationship with “The big birds.” He took a deep breath, and the paper flickered a bit as the breath passed by.

He tried hard to remember the exact reason he had found those tears of laughter… Then by each second it came back, like a picture coming into focus, at first there was a film a whiteness then as he relaxed his mind things became far more clear. The two beasts, though they do get along well in the current time, went through a rough time w. here neither one could find the will to be near each other and seeing that the beasts have only a direct interest in speaking with him. It was probably due to the location being close to their point of origin but simultaneously there was a doubt of that being the case… perhaps it was only out of self-imposed importance that the man felt this way but still it made for a much better story…

He told it like this, with short, snappy sentences calm tones, he wasn’t so sure if she would even fully understand what he had to say, but the story had something she wanted to know placed deep within it. Perhaps it would be better to cut to the chase, the paper she had used was already short on space. He found himself scrapping the idea ”Sometimes laughter is the best medicine.” Was the answer vague? Yes it was but going into the specifics could be borderline exhausting for him. The reason made little sense even now; merely the creature had been fighting, and it just so happened that also the way the man had tried to humor the beast had worked a little too well.. Most of his clothing had become soaked with those tears, making it softer than ever but his skin was more sensitive than he had previously thought. So he found himself not wanting to wear the pieces, even still he crafted other items with the liquid on them. It was in a hope that they would actually find some level of use one day. Today seemed to be that time.

If he was going to go to sleep again there was a chance she could wake once more to lengthen his understanding… Maybe he could learn more about her if he was to ask. Could that work? He wasn’t sure. So with that question lingering in his head he set to work, putting a syringe within some of the tears and pulling it back up as the liquid pulsed inside. Then he slowly pressed it back down, the tears squirting back down onto some of the small clothing he had constructed.

Set the hope for new things.

I think a big thing that everyone worries about is wether or not what they are doing is right, it is a constant confusion. That has been me for a good amount of time now I look at my past and I think hey, maybe I could have done things better. I mean maybe that’s the curse of hindsight. Like, hey I could have done this better or this or that or whatever it is that you may be worried about. Because you now possess a god like view perhaps now knowing hoe others felt or what it is they knew in the time. I am not going to pretend that I am good at that, in fact my mind is prone to obsessively look at the past.

“No, I totally did this wrong, god I can feel it,” Those deep breaths of worry, even as I type this, my fingers reuse up as if they want to claw at the the past and do things right in my minds eye or something. But I guess the important thing is to constantly move forward. Keep moving forward as Disney famously coined. Deep breath -inhale- Okay we’re good I think -exhale-

Rice: The Flavor that you add

It’s plain at the start, the flavor is mostly there whenever you at your own flair, be it salt pepper, soy sauce or whatever else you think would be good. I was getting ready to make rice in the rice cooker. I pulled minute rice out of the cabinet and then the cooker, I then was stuck smelling the uncooked rice. This dry almost wooden floor emanating from the container. That was when it hit me almost as strong as the flavor. There is the idea that you start as something and then end as something else. Rice may start as something plain but it may end different flavors and ideas so just keep moving forward the likelihood you’ll change for the better is rather high.

A small missed opportunity .

It happens all of the time. You do or don’t do something and you sit there thinking I should have done this, why didn’t I do that, Choicewas a post I made yesterday. Every time I thought the title it echoed through my mind.

Every. Single. Time..

I just couldn’t justify Writing Choice Choice Choice……. So yeah I don’t even know if that would make sense, look at that. There I go putting in that self doubt. Stop that. This has been retroactively fixed so you know now you are thinking of that reference from Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. That was my choice.

Music listened to with the post.

Confess (feat. Killer Mike) LOGIC

Robot Rock/ Oh Yeah (Live) Daft Punk

The time on a clock

I woke up this morning. It was still dark out. The leaves and branches were brushing across my window and it made me think about streams, the water rushing by a simple peaceful thought. Something that I wanted to hold onto matter what. I glanced over to my clock, it reads out to be 2:15. That is perfect. There are many hours left to sleep and rest. I close my eyes again and with that it becomes 4:30, the time that I must wake. I think to myself, “No not quite yet.”. I close my eyes again. Boom 4:40, not so bad, I get up, still able to hear the ocean leaves. Water kickstarts my system and with that I hop into the shower. When I get out, the clock, in those blocky digital numbers, reads SOS. Only 10 minutes, not bad. The sky developes the transition between blues. In a few minutes I lose my wallet watch a video on YouTube and then put my shoes all around 5:35. I slip my backpack on brush my teeth, my life feels fine as I jump into the car it happens in a breath then this post came to me, 5:55.

Song:

Confessions of a dangerous mind (Logic)

Hope across multiple days

Now just yesterday I was in town with my dad and two sisters, it was a nice simple exchange. We went to the kiosk in the mall and got our screen protectors replaced, my old one being chipped and cracked in many different ways. It was so jarring in fact that, I had nearly forgotten that the screen beneath was still in perfect condition. No matter how scratched up the screen got it was comforting to think to some extent that it was still okay. In short a thing to keep in mind as the days march ever forward that you are still the same glistening person you hsve always been. Don’t ;use sight of that.

Songs listened to during this post

  • Dreams of Love and literature (Doki Doki Literature club OST)

Well college is back!

You know college is coming back! I’m not really chomping at the bit to go back, but then if you really think about it any bit of knowledge is beneficial, are you gonna use math every waking day of your life?

I mean probably not… I mean today’s world hand holds you on math.. unless you become a math professor or a…engineering degree… you can probably guess that math is not my strong suit so… wait where was I going with this? Oh yeah… so like even if college isn’t your favorite thing in the world it is still knowledge which can help you in your bigger dreams, that is the important thing to remember today!

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